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navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #41 » Loneliness
Open Poetry #41
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Jenna
Member
since 2007-03-20
Posts 180
0 posted 2007-07-23 09:18 AM

To be alone
is to feel the breeze move in all angles,
You can feel it
but there will never be any warmth
from the sting that whips itself around you.
© Copyright 2007 Jenna - All Rights Reserved
suthern
Deputy Moderator 1 TourDeputy Moderator 1 Tour
Member Seraphic
since 1999-07-29
Posts 20723
Louisiana
1 posted 2007-07-23 10:03 AM

How well I know that sting!!! Well done!!
BBGrrl
Member
since 2007-07-17
Posts 181
BC, Canada
2 posted 2007-07-23 12:57 PM

A nice little peice.  A suggestion, you might rewrite this as a tanka.

5,7,5,7,7
JamesMichael
Member Empyrean
since 1999-11-16
Posts 33336
Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
3 posted 2007-07-23 02:28 PM

Nice writing...James
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navwin » Archives » Open Poetry #41 » Loneliness

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