untitled(suggestions appreciated)

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chic
Member

since 2000-01-26

Posts 245
yellville, Ar, U.S.

0 posted 2000-02-25 09:35 AM

This isn't really a poem, but i didn't know were to post it...so i put it here.

When I was eighteen
I was in love.
Little did I know
the evil lurking above.

You got me alone
one dark misty day.
I tried to struggle
but you got ur way.

I tried to tell others
of your assault.
Yet they all blamed me
and said it was my fault.

You say not to tell
for if I do.
You'll do it again
and bid my life ado.

Noone cares
that's what i say.
Why should they care
it wasn't them that day.

People say
their against rape.
Yet when it happens
they offer no escape.

What happened to me
has hurt me so.
But will I ever forget
the answer is NO!!!!!

I know this isn't very good, but it's the best I could do

To be or not to be...that is the question.[hamlet]

sweetcollege_girl
Senior Member

since 1999-12-03

Posts 872
just about where I want to be

1 posted 2000-02-25 09:39 AM

Sis..this is an excellent poem...You showed your hurt well..and as for a name...how about..."NO"?

stay cool

Love ya!

~~Lavada~~

"For every beauty, there is an eye somewhere to see it.
For every truth, there is an ear somewhere to hear it
For every love, there is a heart somewhere to receive it".--Ivan Panin

angel6917
Member

since 2000-01-14

Posts 478
WI

2 posted 2000-02-25 02:16 PM

This is a terriffic poem. It shows the pain well... I have to agree with your sis for a title.
Kristi Lynn

Oo0ostephanio0oO
Member

since 2000-01-19

Posts 194
Massachusetts ~USA~

3 posted 2000-02-25 02:25 PM

This WAS very good. I hope you are doing better. Try your best to stay strong sweetie. Some people are just stubborn jerks, don't pay any attention to them.

(:***Stephani***:)
"A true friend will always stay a friend
whether or not you feel as though the friendship or relationship is about to end."

Mistikman
Senior Member

since 2000-01-10

Posts 682
San Jose, CA, USA

4 posted 2000-02-25 04:21 PM

This was an excellent poem chic, it illustrates the pain and difficulty in dealing with this situation. If you ever want to talk, you have my ICQ. I cant offer much in the way of advice, but I am here if you just need to talk.
I think your sister is right about the title.

Jer
Member

since 1999-12-02

Posts 443
USA

5 posted 2000-02-26 12:55 PM

Who told you that this wasn't a poem? It had a rhyme scheme, meter, and flowed very well. I think this was wonderfully written and the title "NO" suits it very well. Great job.

"WRITING IS EASY. ALL YOU DO IS STARE AT A BLANK SHEET OF PAPER UNTIL DROPS OF BLOOD FORM ON YOUR FOREHEAD." Gene Fowler

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