Open Poetry #10 |
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where's my blue? (a country song's in here somewhere) |
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Ron K. Fox Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925 |
I been reading a lot of heartbreak poems by you girls who've been done wrong. taking things from your perspective I had this running through my head, so here goes, for all you girls and gals. Blue skies and sunny days Fresh picked flowers for my vase A picket fence of white A house up on the hill You promised me blue skies Well, I’m waiting still. Brown and crinkled are the flowers that have died Sitting on this dusty trailer window sill. These red crying eyes are running out of tears, It’s hard to swallow this bitter tasting pill. I’m left here in this silver tin can, day after day, Just listening to this old crackling radio. Even in the night, when you’re laying here next to me In the blackness I feel so damn alone. Where’s my blue? Blue skies and sunny days, Blue skies and so much more. The only blue I see, Is the back Of your faded jeans Watching them walking out the door. That truck of yours gets more mileage from you than me To you I’ve just become an old worn tire There’s some other wheel you’re spinning, yes, its plain to see, I can see that look, it’s in your eyes. You’re drinking buddies don’t come ‘round here no more So I can guess I know where you’re spending time. Is she hearing the same old lies that you once told me? Is she seeing the promise of my blue skies? Where’s my blue? You promised me blue skies,I heard you say, Blue skies and sunny days It’s hard to see The powder blue When your skies Are filled with clouds of gray. Well, you came home drunk again late last night I could smell her cheap perfume in your hair, I packed what little I have left that belongs to me I just don’t have the strength to even care. I’m in your truck you loved so much more than me, Its running fine with this old worn tire, Those storm clouds are parting just in time, Up ahead I see those sunny skies. There’s my blue. < !signature--> Tossing words like wishful coins into the deep well of an open heart. R. fox [This message has been edited by Ron K. Fox (edited 10-29-2000).] |
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© Copyright 2000 Ronald Kenneth Fox - All Rights Reserved | |||
Sunshine
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-25
Posts 63354Listening to every heart |
Sounds like two songs...the original, and a sequel... and it sounds like you've a large heart...to take into mind what women go through... good job, Mr. Ron! Karilea If I whisper, will you listen?...KRJ |
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Kit McCallum
Administrator
Member Laureate
since 2000-04-30
Posts 14774Ontario, Canada |
"Even in the night, when you’re laying here next to me In the blackness I feel so damn alone." "That truck of yours gets more mileage from you than me" Most definately a country song flavour to this wonderful tale Ron ... really well done! ![]() Best wishes, /Kit |
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SEA![]() ![]()
Moderator
Member Seraphic
since 2000-01-18
Posts 22676with you |
RonK~ from a guy's pen, you didn't do too bad ![]() ![]() |
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BSC
Moderator
Member Elite
since 2000-02-04
Posts 2919New York, USA |
Definitely a country flavor Ron, with just a little bit of some Jeff Foxworthy thrown in... Great poem, now let's get on a CD.... Bonnie |
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peppermint35 Senior Member
since 2000-05-28
Posts 1106Texas, USA |
Wonderful Ron!!! You don't just listen; you really hear!!! Definitely a country song; and I love the ending!!! Peppermint Life is a Wheel |
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Ron K. Fox Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925 |
thanks all...I listen well...and if you can sing it...let's do it...I could use some cash...lol |
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Rainydays Member
since 2000-10-21
Posts 324 |
Ron, a wonderful effort you've given. Clever, sardonic, and sensitive (in a honky tonk kind of way!) Thanks, I enjoyed this. Rainydays |
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Sunnyone Member Ascendant
since 2000-07-06
Posts 5334Staffordshire, England |
All women like a man who sees and really understands, so this gets my vote!!! It does have a country song feel to it.....I can almost hear the melody. Great job on this great poem! ![]() Follow your dream! |
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Janet Marie Member Laureate
since 2000-01-22
Posts 18554 |
country blues... ya cant do better than that. this is very cool .. you did a great job with both the theme and the repetion of verse youve pen a lyric of harmony.. and a melody to the ladies poetic eyes and ears.. very nice take care jm |
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Balladeer
Administrator
Member Empyrean
since 1999-06-05
Posts 25505Ft. Lauderdale, Fl USA |
A wealth of possibilities here, Ron...all the ingredients to sing country, down to the bluejeans and trailer. Very creative... |
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brian madden Member Elite
since 2000-05-06
Posts 4374ireland |
Far too good for a country song... this can only be poetry... wonderfully written Ron, sounds more like the blues the me anyway get out the slide guitar...kidding. seriously, excellent poem. "an afixiation a fix on anything the line of life the limb of a tree the hands of he and the promise that s/he is blessed among women". Patti Smith |
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Dee Member Elite
since 2000-08-19
Posts 2330Queensland, Australia |
Ron, this is great. Have you signed Dena Carter yet? Sounds like her kinda stuff! Dee I wish you every happiness and pray you'll always have the best of the good things in life. a brand |
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Ron K. Fox Senior Member
since 2000-10-24
Posts 925 |
Thanks for the replies, but i haven't signed anyone yet, waiting for the best offer lol...yeah right...you all come back now, hear. Tossing words like wishful coins into the deep well of an open heart. R. fox |
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AniKay83 Member
since 2000-06-28
Posts 388Missing Since 1999 |
Hmmmmm....maybe country, maybe Alanis Morisette? Maybe you should break up with your boyfriend? lol.. really, this is great. It's so wonderful to see you pay attention to women's woes. I love a romantic! Much love all, Krissie |
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