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Teen Poetry #7

why

buckysimone
Junior Member

since 2003-10-19

Posts 27

0 posted 2003-11-19 10:09 PM

why
don't you throw out
your hand
will everything
be alright
your smile seems so far
so distant
so free
when can i
can i touch your lips
i'd love
love it to see you smile
the sounds
violins
scratching
the board
why
im reaching
your dragging
im bruising
im losing
why

Match
Member

since 2002-07-01

Posts 286
Canada Edmonton

1 posted 2003-11-19 10:45 PM

What a great write..I found it simple but satisfying, like a glass of milk. very enjoyed

I know you think that I shouldnt still love you
I'll tell you that
But if I didn't say it
Well, I'd still have felt it
Where's the sense in tha

magic_612
Member

since 2003-07-31

Posts 190
NB, Canada

2 posted 2003-11-19 10:59 PM

I agree with that.. good job!

frolicking dolphin
Member

since 2003-02-23

Posts 268
my own special world

3 posted 2003-11-21 04:07 PM

Very interesting style, but it worked well for this poem, nice work

~*~Karen~*~

~All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them~Walt Disney

Spine Grinder
Senior Member

since 2000-10-28

Posts 1127
Standing In Silence...

4 posted 2003-11-21 08:04 PM

I diffently liked this style. Great job.

I soak up all the pain, and accept it in silence~DMX

dertah
Senior Member

since 2003-06-18

Posts 584

5 posted 2003-11-22 09:31 PM

suuuuuuuuuuper!!!!!

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