she still sees, Ugly - pipTalk Forums

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Snow

Senior Member

since 2000-10-16

Posts 1170
desert flower looking for rain

0 posted 2004-01-25 10:30 PM

"...why does my skeleton pursue me
if my soul has fallen away?"
~p.neruda

steavenr
Member Elite

since 2003-11-17

Posts 4058

1 posted 2004-01-25 10:56 PM

"look into thy mirror and this so plainly see
the serenity of thy soul staring back at thee"

poignant and powerful write

J.Samm
Member

since 2004-01-12

Posts 415
Iloilo City, Philippines

2 posted 2004-01-25 11:00 PM

you lines trigger a wave of thoughts. the poem is like a knife that has slashed through my mind and had it bleeding for a while, thinking deeply...why?

Snow

Senior Member

since 2000-10-16

Posts 1170
desert flower looking for rain

3 posted 2004-01-26 02:17 AM

steavenr...thank you very much.

J.Samm...why? i can't answer
that for you... but i thank you for
taking the time to read me.

snow

"...why does my skeleton pursue me
if my soul has fallen away?"
~p.neruda

Susan Caldwell
Member Rara Avis

since 2002-12-27

Posts 8348
Florida

4 posted 2004-01-26 08:00 AM

This was extremely impressive...

"sit on top of the world and tell me how you feel...'cause what you feel is what I feel for you.."
~Dido~

Copperbell
Senior Member

since 2003-11-08

Posts 956

5 posted 2004-01-26 10:20 AM

Beautifully written, so sad...

Snow

Senior Member

since 2000-10-16

Posts 1170
desert flower looking for rain

6 posted 2004-01-26 11:16 AM

susan and copperbell

thank you both for your thoughts,
they're very much appreciated.

snow

"...why does my skeleton pursue me
if my soul has fallen away?"
~p.neruda

Sunshine

Administrator

Member Empyrean

since 1999-06-25

Posts 63354
Listening to every heart

7 posted 2004-01-26 11:22 AM

Several lines were breathtaking
in their imagery...
and I think, overall,
you laid a bit of silk across the desert floor...

Wolf777
Junior Member

since 2001-02-28

Posts 20

8 posted 2004-03-01 12:36 PM

You're beauty goes deeper than anyone I've ever known. Someday you'll believe that and let the past go. GoodGod this poem is good.

M

passing shadows
Member Empyrean

since 1999-08-26

Posts 45577
displaced

9 posted 2004-03-01 04:27 AM

good piece

Toerag
Member Ascendant

since 1999-07-29

Posts 5622
Ala bam a

10 posted 2004-03-03 07:42 AM

this is a great piece....(and I thought it was going to be about Balladeer's wife and her outlook on him)....

Kicking Kim
Member

since 2001-04-16

Posts 426
Cloud Cucko Land!

11 posted 2004-03-03 07:55 AM

"while the midnight spotlight rattles my sleep"

What wonderful imagery. This was an amazing read, the use of imagery and the emotion was just too much!! You are a very talented poet, I think this is the first that I have read of your poems and I'm loving them already!!

^*Kim*^

"Theres no posession, just obsession and growing depression"

Sudhir Iyer
Member Ascendant

since 2000-04-26

Posts 6943
Mumbai, India : now in Belgium

12 posted 2004-03-03 09:58 AM

lucid writing... thanks for sharing this so that I could have the pleasure of reading this work...

regards
sudhir

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