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Teen Poetry #2
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The Mysterious....
| Teen Poetry #2 |
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The Mysterious.... |
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Star Fairy 2 Member
since 1999-09-06
Posts 260cerritos, california, usa |
That Mysterious Boy No One Knows About Caught in the soul of a complex being On the pathways to his heart, in the middle of dreaming Exploring unknown territory and grossly disbelieving The treacherous journey to get to what I’m seeking Constantly lost in the whirlpool of his eyes Reaching out to find a carefully hidden surprise Recklessly fumbling through the entwined Invited in and left alone to get past his disguise Standing before the steel walls of his heart Magic words force the doors to part Trembling, nervous and anxious to start Exploring those nooks and crannies of his intricate heart Helplessly trapped in the astonishment and wonder Lost forever, influenced by the spell I’m under But comfortably residing, never to hear the thunder Living an eternity in a self-proclaimed eighth-wonder… Don't Fall.. Rise in Love -------823------- |
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| © Copyright 2000 Rakhee - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Star Fairy 2 Member
since 1999-09-06
Posts 260cerritos, california, usa |
i was just wondering ... this one felt a little lonely .. so i was wondering if anyone would like to comment on this... por favor  Regret for things you did maybe tempered by time, regret for things you Didn't do, however, is inconsolable... -------823------- |
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Jer Member
since 1999-12-02
Posts 443USA |
Interesting... but lonley like you said. I had to read a couple of times to understand what you were talking about but I think I got it now. Good job. P.S. "nooks and crannies"? Are we eating english muffins?! LOL Sorry.... I felt compeled to write it. |
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Nights Member
since 2000-01-03
Posts 56 |
Hey, nice poem. I really like the detail you put into it. "It's my heart that pounds beneath my flesh it's my mouth that pushes out this breath..."-FTE |
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Mistikman Senior Member
since 2000-01-10
Posts 682San Jose, CA, USA |
great poem. I like all the descriptive words. It helps spice up the poem a lot. I am not a poet, I am merely one who speaks in emotion |
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Star Fairy 2 Member
since 1999-09-06
Posts 260cerritos, california, usa |
thank you... p.s. hehe yep i think i was eating english muffins... Regret for things you did maybe tempered by time, regret for things you Didn't do, however, is inconsolable... -------823------- |
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Oo0ostephanio0oO Member
since 2000-01-19
Posts 194Massachusetts ~USA~ |
i really liked this one alot the words were so descriptive  (:***Stephani***:) "A true friend will always stay a friend whether or not you feel as though the friendship or relationship is about to end." |
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abra-cadabra Member
since 1999-06-21
Posts 75Florissant, Missouri, USA |
I really like this one. Very descriptive words. It's great!! |
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