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My friend (effects challenge)
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My friend (effects challenge) |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg 
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My friend, I've seen you cry in tears that fall for endless days My friend, I've seen you die I stand now, where your body lays My friend, I heard the falling tear That was the last, as God grew near The taunts and accusations The insults they threw I'd always seen you alone a friend, had you ever known? My friend, I heard the falling tears that washed the fear and pain away you dropped your words upon deaf ears I never knew quite why you'd pray You had a friend, I must confess for deaf ears were ears, nonetheless when you'd sit, beside the lake talking to the sky they pointed and laughed at you what more were you left to do? My friend, I saw you fight one time you laid your hand upon my throat My friend, you had avenged my crime and in your eyes, I saw you gloat My friend, that day the truth I saw it made me stop and gape in awe you held my hand, and you smiled said your last few words "you need not remember me up in heaven, there I'll be" My friend, I've seen you cry in tears that fall for endless days My friend, I've seen you die I stand now, where your body lays My friend, I heard the falling tear That was the last, as God grew near you and I were just the same but far too different I'm jealous, and also sad you'd a friend I'd never had [This message has been edited by Allan Riverwood (edited 03-31-2001).] |
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| © Copyright 2001 Brian James Lee - All Rights Reserved | |||
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Joyce Johnson
since 2001-03-10
Posts 9912Washington State |
This is so poignant. Very well done. Joyce |
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ellie LeJeune Member Elite
since 2000-01-10
Posts 4156King of Prussia, PA USA |
Allan; There is so much complexity and layers of meaning here, as life always is. Your poem, in it's beauty, says so many things of friendships hoped for and faith realized. You have a deep mind and a great spirit...a true seeker of wisdom and truth. Ellie A friend hears the song in my heart, and sings it to me when my memory fails. |
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Songbird Member Elite
since 1999-12-15
Posts 2184Missouri |
This is awesome.. so deep and so full of meaning. You have wisdom beyond your years. I will be looking for more of your writing. |
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Lakewalker Member Elite
since 2000-08-05
Posts 3289On the streets w/ people |
Allan, This is excellent man, thanks for sharing it. Your words show many meanings to me. This truly has me thinking. Nice job. "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle" |
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sandgrain Member Elite
since 1999-09-21
Posts 3662Sycamore, IL, USA |
This piece is awesome. How many times have I been passive to one who desparately needed a friend, I wonder. You are a friend, a Christian in action, and a great poet. Thank you for sharing these great works of wisdom with us, Allan. Rae |
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Allan Riverwood
since 2001-01-04
Posts 3502Winnipeg |
Thank you all for your praise.  It means a lot to me.The form was something I'm playing a bit around with, that my friend Kevin used to do with Senryus... every other stanza was done in Tanka format. Rae- I am a poet, but not exactly a Christian. Thank you for your words still. ~Allan The sun was born, so it shall die. ~VNV Nation, "Further" [This message has been edited by Allan Riverwood (edited 04-01-2001).] |
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WhtDove Member Rara Avis
since 1999-07-22
Posts 9245Illinois |
Allan I don't know what to say. You've blown me away with this most excellent piece of writing! I agree with all the above comments here. This is just some superb writing! |
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